Sunday, February 21, 2010

Dear Jacob,

I've missed you every minute of every day since you've been gone. Daddy and I were so excited about your arrival. Everyday we were planning and getting ready for you. I had daddy on a new list of "to dos" every weekend. Ava has asked about you. She used to poke on you while you were in my tummy, and she would kiss and hug you. I showed her your picture and she kissed it. She loves you very much. It breaks my heart that you won't get to grow up with your big sister. It makes me sad to know we won't ever see you roll on your tummy, crawl, take your first steps or say your first words. We won't get to see you grow up to be a big boy, play football with your daddy or attend your first day of kindergarten. We will miss out on so many things. A lifetime. You never saw me, your dad or your sister. You never saw any of the friends and family who love you so much. Your life was so short, you never even got to take a breath. Just becuase your life was short, Angel, doesn't mean it was insignificant. You gave us so much joy and excitement. All of us were so thrilled about you. You gave us the vision of our family. That we could be more than 3, and one day we will be. The 9 months I carried you were the happiest months of my life. I am grateful I was with you every day of your life. I cared for you, fed you and kept you safe all that time. I held you in my arms for hours after you were born, until I had to let you go. You were with your momma every day of your life. I am so grateful for that. I want you to know that although you are no longer in momma's arms, you are in my heart always and will be forever. Until we meet again and I can hold you in my arms. I look forward to that day again. Until then, I will take care of your sister and daddy and you will be in their hearts as well. I will thank God everyday of my life for blessing mine with yours. Not only did you bring joy and hope to our lives, but you gave so many others another reason to be grateful for their healthy babies and children. You showed us there are worse things in life than an argument with daddy or an empty checking account. You've changed our lives forever. And as heartbreaking as it is to lose you, I am glad God blessed us with you. If I had known what was going to happen, I would have had you anyway. Because I couldn't imagine my life without you sweet boy. I couldn't imagine never having known your love.


  1. Sarah, thank you for sharing sweet Jacob with us. I think of you guys daily and pray for peace in your hearts each night. We may never know why all of this happened, but we will all hold a special place in our hearts for your sweet baby boy. I love you and hope to see you soon.

  2. Sarah you are amazing. You have done a beautiful tribute to your precious baby. You have said words no Mother should ever have to say and what a wonderful job you have done. We will never know why. God bless you and your precious family. You have a very special place in my heart and I am so thankful our paths have crossed. I continue to pray for you and your family. I think of you daily. I love you. Carol Davis

  3. Sarah,
    I have prayed everyday for you and your family...I am so so very sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing him with us.


    Amanda Snyder

  4. Sweet Sarah, this is such a beautiful memorial to your Angel Jacob. I pray for your peace and healing every day and am so honored that you shared this with us. Your words are beautiful, and it is very true that he has affected all of us in one way or another. Although he had to go too soon, he instilled in all of us how precious the lives of our little ones are. I know I hug mine a little tighter these days.

  5. Sarah and Yoshi-
    What a sweet thing to do. I am so sorry for your loss and I won't pretend to know how you feel. My family will continue to pray for the healing of yours.
    With Love, Brandi Mann and family

  6. Sarah,
    Thank you so much for sharing this. My prayers are with you everyday. I will hold my family closer every day now. You are an amazing, beautiful woman.

  7. Sarah & family,
    Im so sorry for your loss. Your courage and grace during this painful time is inspiring. Thank you for sharing the story of sweet baby Jacobs life.

  8. I cannot even begin to imagine the pain that you and Yoshi are going through. You are so brave and corageous to share such personal and private feelings with us. Thanks for that! Please know that you are in our thoughts and prayers and our biggest wish is that you find peace and understanding soon.

  9. Sarah, this is such a beautiful way to share Jacob with the world and keep his memory alive. My heart aches thinking of the pain you all are enduring, I pray you find some understanding soon.

  10. Sarah & Yoshi:
    Jacob is beautiful. Your letter brings me to tears. I am reminded of what a blessing my family is to me as I know yours is to you. I continue to pray God's peace and understanding come to you both.
    Love to you all from the Heatherly Family

  11. Sarah & Yoshi, How beautiful this is! It is amazing how God's love and grace flows through your words and back into your heart. Such a testimony of your faith. I just pray for you both and know that baby Jacob is being rocked in the arms of Jesus and you will be with him again. All my love, Tami

  12. Sarah--

    You don't know me but I know exactly where you are. I lost my sweet baby boy, Ian, 6 months ago. I too started a blog so that everyone could know my little man. My heart and prayers go out to you and your famliy.


  13. Sarah and Yoshi,
    Our heart and prayers are with you. What amazing love and strength you have to share Jacob with us. Your letter was beautiful and reminds me how precious everyday of life is with our children. Thank you for sharing your little boy, what an inspiration you are!


  14. Sarah and Yoshi,
    Your tribute to your precious Jacob is beautiful. He was blessed to have such a wonderful family. We continue to pray for peace and healing. Even though he was taken from you, he will always remember your unconditional love. God bless your family.
    The McCormick Family

  15. Thank you dear Yoshi, Sarah and Ava for sharing beautiful Jacob our precious and irreplaceable Great Grandson. We loved you Jacob, before you were born, we loved you Jacob when you visited our world and we will love you all our days until we hold you again. Sarah, you are a remarkable Woman, with a strong,loving and generous heart. May G-d be with you.
    Papa and Momma Julie